Today it has been one month without my dad. It was an okay day. Emotional for various reasons. One of my very dear friends lost her mother today. She was an amazing woman and my heart is heavy knowing how she may feel right now. (PS: if you’re reading this, I love you.) People always say “Time heals all” but that really isn’t true for all situations.
Over the last few weeks I’ve really opened my eyes to the way i’m living my life. I’ve buried myself in work for so long that I haven’t realized how much I’ve been missing out on. I miss old friends and family. One of my goals is to get in touch with the people I’ve missed, and stay in touch. Life really is so short, and too unpredictable. With that being said I’ve made another decision. A lifestyle change. I’m using this as a promise to myself that I will take better care of myself. I’ll eat healthier, I’ll exercise. I’ll try my best to live a long and fulfilling life. When I first saw my dad’s death certificate I didn’t know what to think. He had so many health problems I wasn’t even aware of. It scared me. It made me realize I need to put myself first, not last. In his honor, I’m putting Darion first for the first time in my life.
The reason I started this ‘blog’ was to get my feelings off my chest. I’m horrible opening up to people, it makes me feel so vulnerable and uncomfortable. Reading my first post, it hurts me to come face to face with how much pain I was (am) holding inside. I hope these get lighter and happier, but they will always be my real feelings and thoughts. Good or bad. Don’t hold things in for too long, and don’t forget to take care of yourself.